I had an interesting conversation with a friend yesterday. We spoke about flirting and its inappropriateness, especially when it comes from a committed or married person. My argument was if flirtation was meant only in kindness or jest then it should be acceptable. Her rebuttal was if it was not something that you could say in from of your wife then it was not appropriate. I assured her that I would not cross the line into forbidden territory. I do not insinuate a desire for sex nor ask for sex. I have too much Love and I am not going to disrespect my wife, family, friends or strangers.
I have to admit that I was a little offended, only because I always thought she knew that my comments are always mere playfulness and designed to foster good moods and smiles nothing more or less.
After the conversation I called MY WIFE and she was the one who explained me to me.
I asked do you think I would cheat on you and she respond no, she did not believe that. She asked why and I explained the conversation between my friend and me. This is what she told me. She said YES you do flirt with women and what you may consider kindness or
simple flirtation can be misinterpreted by a woman. She may feel that you are insinuating more. At that point, I understood exactly what she meant, but I figure that my female friends knew the line I did not cross.
I have always understood that most women enjoy compliments and a little flirting as long as it did not cross the line and turn to disrespect. I have always been known (or so I thought) to be the guy that you (male or female) could count on to help without a hidden agenda. Now before the angels come down and place the glowing halo on my head, I want to say that I am very much a man. I find women attractive. Physically attractive, sexually attractive, and some not at all, BUT I believe that being a 100% man means that you have self-control and smarts.
I believe that:
· Sexual attraction is natural and I embrace that, but I am not ruled by my penis. I rule it.
· My family deserves Love and stability. My wife and kids deserve a man who will work to keep our family united, safe, secure and loved. We do not need another set of young black males being raised with the father outside of the house.
· I do not put myself in any situation that will allow me to compromise my principles.
· It does not matter what the woman does, ultimately the decision to act is mine!
Note: I also know that many people have been approached all their lives by individuals who always have a hidden agenda, so when someone like me comes along, it is only natural to think that there is an ulterior motive.
Lastly, I have to admit there is a little selfish motive to my actions. When I take the time to compliment someone, ask how they are doing, or mention something to make them smile, it makes me feel great! I LOVE it. When I can make anyone smile or laugh. I get a joy, a sort of high from the fact that I was able to impact them in a positive way. I know it may sound a little hokey or contrive, but try it. Smile all day and compliment, help, and make people laugh or smile. I know you will feel great at the end of the day.
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